he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize