Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
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