I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
