I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
