the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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