If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
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