Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
she looked like the before picture.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize