I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I deserve this hangover.
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