Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize