So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
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I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
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Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
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