she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Randomize
