12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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