I could have mohawked her pubes.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter