I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize