If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
