Whats the glycemic index on semen?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I want her autograph on my taint
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Randomize
