Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
