I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Randomize
