I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
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