Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
