so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
