i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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