I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Did you pee in the oven last night??
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
