I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize