...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize
