Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
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