she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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