Apparently you make a good broom.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
