would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
