Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
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