I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
We need to get me chipped asap
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
