I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Randomize
