Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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