Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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