new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
