Are we in a gay sports bar?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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