Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
