Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize