drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
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How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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