I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
