My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
This girl is more easily done than said...
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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