and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
