You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
