ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize