She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize
