And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
