In the future we'll all be gay
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
