well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize