I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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