why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
