look no pants
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
My ass is underappreciated
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
