yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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